Brendon Goddard To Continue In Role As Full-Time Cunt In 2017

While Essendon coach John Worsfold shuffles the magnets to fit his returning stars into the side, there will be one that stays firmly in place throughout the entire 2017 season, he has confirmed, that of 31-year-old veteran and full-time cunt Brendon Goddard.

“The development of a few of the younger blokes did give me reason to think things over throughout the off-season, but when it comes to being a good old fashioned cunt there’s just no one that can match it with BJ,” Worsfold explained.

Goddard hit the ground running in the first hit-out of the JLT Community Series, dishing out several verbal sprays to his teammates and the umpires during the first quarter. The utility was taken off in the second half, with Worsfold keen to leave some cuntiness up his sleeve for when the Bombers take on a young Gold Coast team on February 26.