Human Highlight Reel Liam Jones Sick Of Carrying Teammates

Following the weekend’s lackluster display against an emerging St Kilda side that left their fans disappointed yet again, the Carlton playing group have been implored by the explosive animal Liam Jones to do more.

“I need you blokes to lift,” said Jones. “We had all these supporters come out to see us and none of you blokes even attempted mark of the century. Show something.”

The big showman was instrumental on the weekend with six disposals, one tackle and four marks, but is growing increasingly fed up with having to do all the heavy lifting when it comes to turning it on for the fans. So much so, that he is considering other offers, with the Heidelberg Tigers among the leading candidates.