North Melbourne Treat First-Gamer To Shower of Cheap Aldi-Brand Sports Drink

North Melbourne were quick to crack open the war chest following a stellar victory over the West Coast Eagles on Sunday, digging deep into the coffers to shower debutant Will Walker in a cascade of PurAqua N2 Sports Drink, a long-held and deeply respected club tradition.

“Easy boys, 500 ml will do it,” said Brad Scott as he watched on, carefully ensuring that his players did not exceed the quota of invaluable electrolyte-replenishing beverage.

Walker claimed to have enjoyed his PurAqua N2 Sports Drink shower, but is said to have felt some remorse when seeing club trainers try desperately to recover some of the spilled liquid from the surface of Blundstone Arena using cheap sponges, also sourced from German discount supermarket chain Aldi.