Patients Turned Away From Geelong’s Hospitals As City Deals With Dangerfield’s Corkie

Geelong’s health system has descended into chaos this weekend, as the city’s doctors were forced to refuse emergency care for the public as they focus their efforts on rehabilitating Patrick Dangerfield’s corked thigh.

“This city has endured a grave medical crisis or two in its time, and we will again,” declared Geelong mayor Darryn Lyons at an emergency town hall meeting following the Cats’ ill-fated training session on Saturday. “The brightest medical minds of Greater Geelong are on the job and working to ensure Dangerfield rises again.”

The onballer’s injury sent shockwaves through the local medical community as a number of high-profile doctors were called into work in the middle of the night. With the health system under unprecedented strain, the council has also formally requested foreign aid, with Germany preparing to send several of its esteemed soft tissue specialists.