Victoria Police Discover Hard Drive Full Of Kyle Reimers Highlights In Bomber Thompson’s Home

Detectives executing a search warrant in Port Melbourne have made a disturbing discovery, with sources confirming that Victoria Police have secured a hard drive from the home of Essendon legend Mark Thompson brimming with video highlights of dynamic former forward Kyle Reimers.

“We always knew he was a sicko,” said Chief Commissioner Gary Ainslie. “But this has exceeded even our worst suspicions, the detectives on the scene are now been treated for post-traumatic stress.”

Video highlights of the now-retired Reimers have been outlawed under the Australian Constitution since 2011, on the grounds that the content is extremely offensive and unfit for consumption by viewers of all ages. Possession carries a minimum jail term of 15 years, and police made the alarming discovery after an anonymous tip off from a former blonde-haired colleague.

More to come.